Be Back Soon

-Gone Writing.
Be back soon.
cheers :)

Letter of the Seven

I'm glad your back. Things always seem to get rough when you're ill. But you're getting somewhere! Era's on a roll right now, I can tell. Eon's slacking a bit, but he'll change. Who needs the muse anyway? You're doing fine without her. Hey, maybe you'll even make her a little jealous? I hope so.
Vaark must still be angry though, because things aren't doing too well in his department. Do you have some kind of block against organized thought or something because this happens a lot more than I'd like. I don't want to be tripping over things in the dark, so at least pick up the pieces. Sable should help you out. I think she's slacking right now, though. That's your department. Talk some sense into her.
Stay sharp. I'll be checking in. Don't take this for granted. You can do it.

-The Wish Writer

Designing

Today, off the topic of writing, I just finished designing a centerpiece for the new gym being built at my school. I guess I'm just excited. I've been designing a lot of stuff lately and I'm happy because I've just started to realize how good my work is! It's not the best, and I'm still working on some stuff, but if it's good enough to get compliments from professionals, that must be a good sign. So I've been hoping to get a job in graphic design and what I really want to do is design covers or book jackets. Or illustrate. I have no idea how to get a job like that, but that's probably the ideal career for me. Books, books, books. I love it.

Just a Thought

You know how people say that artists suffer for their work? I don't always understand that, but writers-we suffer for our work. But its not because of the writing itself(always), I think it's the other way around. We write because we've suffered. Somehow, it gives us what we need to write convincing truths. It makes the pain of our characters seem much more believable. Of course, it's not like we have to get shot to imagine the pain for a character or anything. But isn't it easier to base fiction in truth? Don't the best characters reflect part of the author and his/her experiences?
I wondering where people stand on the case. The people I give my work to to read are always saying they're trying to find me in my characters. They can, of course. So I'm thinking about how deep the psychology of it all goes. How much is fact, and how much is fiction?

Short Story- Part 2

Okay, we seem to be on the right track. This is part of central Digilo. Very dangerous. You never know what horrible things are sneaking up behind you. So always check behind you. In fact, it would probably be easier just to walk backwards. That way you’re always looking behind you. Yeah, let’s go with that. Oh, but be careful you don’t walk into things. Dangerous things. Whoa, watch out, there’s an angry golem behind you! Nah, made you look. You’re quite gullible. I’m having fun. Isn’t this fun?
*sigh* I think we’ve been walking in circles. Look, I know we’ve passed that rock before. What do you mean “it looks like all the other rocks?” It most certainly does not! That one is much more round and it has a little knobby thing at the end. Right there, see? It’s like a rock pariah. And besides all that, it’s getting dark. Well, darker. It’s always dark in Digilo. But when it’s dark dark, nightmarish creatures come out. You might be devoured! It would be so tragic. What would I do without you to tease? I know! I can’t imagine it either! Therefore, we should find shelter! Some place dark and eerie and dangerous. Huh? That defeats the purpose of what? Don’t be ridiculous. The monsters would never think to look in a place like that for people. They always look in the safest, brightest, most secure place for their meals. You worry too much. Trust me; my logic is GENIUS! Here’s the plan—we go to that little cave thing on the map and hide out there until the ‘slightly lighter than dark but still quite dark’ morning. Then we’ll sneak out and look for this imaginary exit of yours. Upon not finding this exit, I will then laugh at your face and force you to say that I was right all along. Bwah ha ha! I can’t wait!

There is no time for rest and no time for doubt. This is a life and death situation. The outcome of this event will change everything. The circumstances are dire. This may very well be the last time we speak. Oh, cruel world! Thou have such a way of torment and casts agony upon thy wretched soul. You must carry on without me! You hear me? Go on without me! For as I suffer, please know that you will live on and be happy! Live for me! Be happy for me! And do not look back and regret my loss! It is alright. I did not plan on eating that sandwich anyway. It looks much nicer there upon the dirt; contrasted by the soft lamp’s light and the brown, brown soil. It is such a sad thing to see your lunch fall to the ground and know that you will never be able to taste the wonders of that particular sandwich. It is painful to walk away and see it get smaller in the distance and know it is far better that you did not pick it back up and eat it anyway. Because like most things in life, it is not a pleasant experience to see what you loved so dearly dirtied by the world. Unfortunately, there is a vast amount of dirt in the world and it is unavoidable that someday you too will drop your precious lunch and have to walk away feeling unfulfilled. (literally). I will never forget the loss I have experienced here today. Now…
What was I talking about? Your expression of annoyance distracted me. It was something about baseball, right? Oh, well. Forget that. The more important thing is that the cave should be right over there. Finally, a shelter; a place to hide from the creatures of the night. Just a little farther! We’re so close! Run faster! I think I see it! This is just too perfect! Yes, YES! We’re here! And… it’s not here. Wha—? Why? Where? Give me that map. Let’s see… Yes. We’re here… That little thing that looks like a hazard sign is right here… And where we are right now is here. Hmm. Oh, this is a coffee stain. My bad. Come on, now, anyone could make a mistake like that. We’ll just turn around and head back to the clown thing and everything will be—Holy cow!
T-there’s a huge snake beast behind you! No, this time I’m serious! Watch where you’re going. Move! Geez, be more careful. I thought for sure it was going to swallow you whole. When it ate you up to your knees, boy that was scary! I would have lost the map. Oh, and you too of course. Yeah. That’s important. I told you it’s dangerous out here, didn’t I? You should be more considerate to those monsters; they just lost their lunch you know. And I can relate to that. It’s a sad, sad thing to lose your lunch. But hey, no biggie. There’s always the second time around. It’s called dinner. Let’s make sure we’re not around for then, kay? I’m more of a breakfast person myself anyway. It’s the meal that starts the day, right? It’s great. Perfect, even. Yup. So I guess this means we’re still going to keep looking for this “exit”, huh? Well lead the way.
Come again? What do you mean you don’t know the way? I gave you a map!
… The monster ate it?! I don’t believe this! First you drop into Digilo unexpected without even calling ahead, then you go and steal my map, and then you have the nerve to give it to a monster for supper? You are a very bad person indeed! Deep breath… Fine, fine. This isn’t so bad. Things have been worse. I mean, not long ago I dropped my sandwich on the ground. It doesn’t get much worse than that. We’ll just have to use my vast knowhow of Digilo to find the Ever Elusive Exit. The EEE, for short.

To be continued...

Motivation

You know, I'm always asking advice of other writers and always looking for answers to questions that only make sense in my head. I asked a writer how she kept herself motivated to write and how she kept herself inspired. I wanted to know how to do it myself.
Honestly, there is no answer. There's no advice to be given. If I'm a true writer, I'll do it. I'll motivate myself; that's how everyone does it. There's no secret. I guess I'm too stubborn to believe that. But whatever. It's okay. I'm writing more tonight. My story will come back to me. I can just write other things until then. Like this blog. Yeah...
Besides, it seems that whenever I read other author's stuff too much, I lose my own sense of style and adapt theirs until it wears off. I must be some kind of sponge.
... Sponge Cake. That's good stuff. Cream filling... Anyway, it's probably best to read my own stuff for a while. Worth a try. Maybe I should wish for some inspiration.

Going... maybe

Okay, I wrote about three sentences yesterday. Hurray. It's all I could do and I feel like I'm standing in a field, watching all these amazing words float past me and I'm unable to catch any of them. Someone give me a net. Or some flypaper or something. I've got to get going. Why is writing so hard sometimes?
Anyway, I guess I just feel more like designing right now. I'd rather be on Illustrator than Word. But I will attempt more tonight! I swear it on my dessert! (Not really)
I just gave a copy of my manuscript to someone to read/edit/tell me how awful it is. (First draft) And so hopefully, she'll bug me to finish the rest of the story and maybe that will get me going too. I really hate to give my unfinished stuff to people to read, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
And I get german chocolate cake for desert.

Short Story- Part 1

This is just a funny short story I wrote to cheer myself up. Enjoy.

Welcome to Disney Land!!! Just kidding! This is not Disney Land, but more like a hellish and horrific version of such a fantasy park. This is Digilo. Hurry and count to three! Spin around, quick! You must neutralize the curse that has just come upon you! Don’t just stand there and stare, hurry and do it! Oh, wait. No… too late. Yup, you’re cursed. What? It’s your own fault. You should have listened. Don’t get mad at me just because you’re listening skills are lax. Heheh. I was kidding again. Sorry, sorry. It’s just too easy. But, back to business. Here are the facts: you really are in Digilo, a horrid place that is indeed like a sinister version of a certain amusement park. You are in fact all alone here with no help whatsoever and no one is going to come and save you. Most likely, you will suffer a horrendous death and be easily forgotten. But hey, look at the bright side.
…
Hmm. Yeah. See that tiny little light over there under that trashcan? Yeah, that’s the bright side. So look at it. Maybe it will do something interesting—if you’re lucky; which you must not be because you ended up here. And what about me, you ask? Well that’s obvious. … No I’m not going to tell you! I said it was a secret! Oh, I said “obvious”. Well, it’s an obvious-secret, okay! Now where was I? Oh yeah. So, you’ll never get out of here. Never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never, nev—okay this is boring. Tell you what? I’ll give you this map of Digilo. You can just go see for yourself. No, you’ve got it upside-down. Okay, yeah, it goes like this. See that little clown shaped thing? That’s where we are. … I don’t care if you don’t like clowns! Now, see up here? There’s a cave and there’s a place of pain and misery. It’s got a little smiley-face icon, see? Don’t bother asking me. So, you can look around all you want and you’ll see that there is absolutely, positively, and without-a-doubt no possible way out.
What? The big EXIT icon? Pfft. That’s no exit! It’s… well it’s a…
Fine! Go check it out if you want. Go find the “escape” route, see if I care! There is no way I’m leaving the clown area.
O-okay. W-wait for me. I’m not scared! You took my only map! You fiend! You map stealer! You sicken me! And I trusted you. I guess I’ll just have to go along and make sure you don’t steal anything else, sticky-fingers.

I interrupt this story for an important news bulletin. All neighborhoods in the Digilo area; please be on the lookout for a conniving and fiendish map stealer! You’re maps will be stolen and you will find yourself lost on an empty highway with no direction and you will want to cry like a baby. This notorious map stealer will be caught and persecuted upon capture. If you have any information concerning this evil, evil person, please notify us as 1-800-DisneyLand. Be on the lookout and please make sure to keep your maps in a safe and secure location until the perpetrator has been brought to justice. We now return you to your regularly scheduled story.

What? Don’t look at me like that! I was just trying to kill the time. I’m not the criminal here. Anyway, we should be there pretty soon. Oh! Stop! Stop! I just had a brilliant idea! We should… walk at a snail’s pace. Oh, wait; WE’RE ALREADY DOING THAT! Pick up the pace please, unless you want a giant worm-like beast to come over here and eat your fingers off one by one! Hehe, I said please. And besides, you don’t know what kind of terrible creatures lurk around these parts. There are huge, enormous, no… MONSTEROUS… er… monsters about! There are ones with giant, sharp fangs made of… teeth. And small poisonous ones with… poison. And there are even some so horrible and terrifying, just describing them would made your hair spontaneously combust! (That’s ‘catch on fire’ for those of you who like to steal maps)
This is a cruel and unforgiving place. There are those who are eaten, and those who eat the ones who ate the eaten. And then there are those who just die. Yeah, lots of those too. But no one ever escapes, because no one knows where the exit is or even if the exit exists. I can only hope that someday I might exit the existing exit and leave this terrible place. But I doubt even you will find the way out on that silly map. For you see, that silly map is something I like to call “fake”. And like all the fake things in the world, it is usually not very helpful and makes you feel hollow and foolish inside. That’s why it’s a good thing my map isn’t fake. I’d use my not fake map if I could find it but it seems to be missing. So I guess that one will have to do.

to be continued...

Void

My mind has been in a dark void for some time. I keep thinking about death and how fragile and scary life can be. I know, I'm depressing. But I really hate thinking like that. Sometimes, it's just hard to make yourself happy, no matter what you do. Normally, I'd say that having other people around to help would make me feel better, but honestly, that just makes it worse. People don't always understand. And when they try to get me to spill it, I feel less like telling them. *sigh. I think I'll just go read a book.

Letter of the Seven

I'm proud of you. I hope you're going to continue to show some initiative. Just keep going, don't look back. And stop wasting time with less important things.
It's kind of tough, so I prefer having Vin run around. He's the one in charge of these things. Glad it's not me.
But, hey, if you need any support, I'll do my best. Can't tell you when the Muse will be around again.
Anyway, keep on going. Era says hi. And she wants to know if you're doing any quick changes. She doesn't like surprises. I know you do, so try not to startle her.

-The Wish Writer

Blox Blox Blox

Other than a crippling bout of writer's block, I feel okay about things right now. I've taken some time to try and re-inspire. Well, the time was given to me anyway, by my fickle muse who is only reliable for a day or two at a time.
It's not that I don't want to write, or even don't feel like writing. It's just that when I try sometimes, I get going at three-words-per-hour. Usually, I end up deleting it all by the next day too. Eventually, I just crack and all that creative flow comes rushing back for a week or so. I'm a slow-going writer. But I'll finish the story no matter what.

Letter of the Seven

You're burning wishes left and right. Get a clue, you've got to step up.

This is the last time I'm going to go gallivanting through the dark for you. I know all about the deadlines and I wish you'd tell me what's going on. When I was at the shop I ran into Varrk. If you remember anything from last week, you'll probably be able to guess what he said.
"There's no changing things if Shade's not willing to put in the work." And he had the most awful grimace when he said it.
Honestly, I didn't have a reply because I completely agree with him. I don't mind being your backup, but the main responsibility falls to you. You should consider what you put the rest of us through at times. If you want to make it, stop burning wishes.

-The Wish Writer

To be brave?

How do you be brave? You just focus on something you need to do and go for it, right? It's so much harder than that though, isn't it? And I'm sure everyone understands. The hardest part is knowing that it's not something you can just pick up somewhere. You can't grow into it. It can't be taught. You need to find it within yourself. And that takes some MAJOR soul searching.
I truly admire the people who can rush into circumstances that require courage without a second thought.
The reason I bring it up is that I just gave a copy of my story to my Grandmother as a gift before it gets published. And I'm so embarrassed about it. I don't know how other authors felt the first time they knew someone would read their work. I don't know how they handled the knowledge that they would soon be the center of admiration or criticism. Or both. I'm proud of my own work. But I can't take criticism. Bad news for a writer. It's a serious problem, and I know, I need to toughen up. Not everyone will like what I write. Get over it.
People criticize my art all the time. I'm okay with that, to a reasonable degree. But when someone reads my work, I get so anxious. I think it's because writing just goes so deep. It's my passion, my deepest and truest dream. When writers write, we put our very souls into our work. Writer's like me, we don't always cherish every word we put down, but we try to. We want to. And what we write evolves into something amazing. It's a part of us. It contains bits of who we are; our fears, our hopes and dreams, our love really... But if other writers will agree with this or not, I don't know. I'm sure not everyone is as soft as me.

Changes

When I think of the world, there's so much I want to do, and so much I fear. Last night, I stood outside listening to the wind. From where I live, I can see the city. The lights flickered like fireflies against the dark sky. You can't help but feel so small then. Sometimes, it feels so easy to get swallowed by the darkness around you. I'm always keeping hope that someday, things won't be so bad. I want to be alive to see the world change for the better.
Long ago, when the world was new, I think I would be afraid to live then and there. There was so much danger. But now, things haven't improved much. The only difference is that now, it seems like people are creating their own downfalls, as well as the downfall of others.
Don't get me wrong, there are so many good people in the world. It took me a long time to see that, and I regret not seeing it sooner. But when I hear about all the disasters happening in the world (and to countries other than my own no less), it seems like the good people and the bad people draw their lines. Their true colors appear in times of desperation and tragedy. Maybe this is a good thing. Everyone comes together, total strangers, and it amazes me how many people rush to help those who need it.
This revitalizes my hope, because it means I have a little less to fear. There are good people out there to help; to make this world a better place. Someday, I hope that people like these will have a greater power over corruption.

Welcome to the Life

What is this for? I don't really know. I just want it to help me. I need all the help I can get. It doesn't matter if I feel silly or ashamed or like I'm conforming to an over-glorified way of digital communication.
I've got a wish. I want to write. I want to write until the day turns dark and the dark turns to a dismal overcast morning. The problem is, everyone wants to write. Whether they do or not is up to them but EVERYONE wants to write. I can't take a walk down the street without bumping into someone with a hope of someday writing a book. I can't watch TV without hearing about some celebrity or host having written a few. I know that doesn't mean much; why let that distract me from my own dreams? But where once being a writer made people feel special and unique, now if I tell someone I'm writing a book, my response is "Oh, yeah? That's nice. Wanna get a drink?"
I've found that because everyone believes they can write a book (even when they have zero skills or training) and publishers are scrambling to get every cent they can from author's earnings, I can't ever find a good book to read! I've resorted to safely following authors I know I like and never trying anything new.
Not only that, but how on Earth can I judge my own skills in the publishing world when people are getting published just because they're famous? Good stories gone to waste and trash being popped out of the publishing houses like stale popcorn everyday... I can't help but feel cold inside.
If I had a hundred wishes, I'd make sure one went out to all the writers with good ideas and loads of talent to get published. If I had ONE wish... well, it would probably be to have superpowers or something. But as a writer, I'm going to make it with my own talent. I'm going to find a great idea, make it my own, and set a new standard in the world of writing. Someday, somehow. Famous last words.